The First Newspaper

More Books

More by this Author

HIGH TIMES IN THE VALLEY

OF HOLINESS!

----

THE WATER-WORKS CORKED!

----

BRER MERLIN WORKS HIS ARTS, BUT GETS
LEFT?

----

But the Boss scores on his first Innings!

----

The Miraculous Well Uncorked amid
awful outbursts of

INFERNAL FIRE AND SMOKE
ATHUNDER!

----

THE BUZZARD-ROOST ASTONISHED!

----

UNPARALLELED REJOIBINGS!

-- and so on, and so on. Yes, it was too loud. Once I could have enjoyed it and seen nothing out of the way about it, but now its note was discordant. It was good Arkansas journalism, but this was not Arkansas. Moreover, the next to the last line was calculated to give offense to the hermits, and perhaps lose us their advertising. Indeed, there was too lightsome a tone of flippancy all through the paper. It was plain I had undergone a considerable change without noticing it. I found myself unpleasantly affected by pert little irreverencies which would have seemed but proper and airy graces of speech at an earlier period of my life. There was an abundance of the following breed of items, and they discomforted me:

LOCAL SMOKE AND CINDERS.

    Sir Launcelot met up with old King
    Agrivance of Ireland unexpectedly last
    weok over on the moor south of Sir
    Balmoral le Merveilleuse's hog dasture.
    The widow has been notified.

    Expedition No. 3 will start adout the
    first of mext month on a search f8r Sir
    Sagramour le Desirous. It is in com-
    and of the renowned Knight of the Red
    Lawns, assissted by Sir Persant of Inde,
    who is compete9t. intelligent, courte-
    ous, and in every way a brick, and fur-
    tHer assisted by Sir Palamides the Sara-
    cen, who is no huckleberry hinself.
    This is no pic-nic, these boys mean
    busine&s.